Parenting third culture kids (TCKs) – children who grow up in a culture different from their parents’ passport culture – presents unique challenges and often requires creative solutions. We offer some guidance, grounded in research and practical wisdom, for parents of TCK families.

In part 1 of this two-part series, we focused on some of the context-specific challenges of parenting TCKs. Identifying these unique challenges, and knowing that you are not alone in facing them, is an important first step. So, how can you begin to address them? 

Key strategies for the TCK family…

• Encourage open communication: create a safe space for your children to share their experiences and emotions.
• Maintain traditions: incorporate family traditions to foster a sense of continuity and belonging.
• Build support networks: connect with other TCK families and expatriate communities for a shared understanding.
• Seek professional guidance: use counsellors or therapists familiar with the TCK experience to support emotional and identity challenges.

… and some of the best parenting tips

1. Foster a strong relationship

• Spend quality time with your child daily, even if it’s just 10–15 minutes of focused attention.
• Build trust by listening actively and showing empathy for their feelings.

2. Set clear and consistent boundaries

• Establish rules and explain the reasons behind them.
• Be consistent in enforcing consequences to help children understand the importance of responsibility.

3. Model the behavior you want to see

• Children often imitate their parents. Show respect, kindness, patience and resilience in your actions.

4. Encourage independence

• Give children age-appropriate responsibilities to build confidence and problem-solving skills.
• Allow them to make mistakes and learn from them in a safe environment.

5. Communicate effectively

• Use open-ended questions to encourage them to share their thoughts.
• Avoid criticism and instead focus on constructive feedback.

6. Praise effort, not just outcomes

• Make it clear that your love is not tied to their achievements or behavior.
• Emphasise the value of hard work, perseverance and learning from failures over simply achieving success.

7. Teach emotional regulation

• Help your child identify and express their feelings in healthy ways.
• Use calming techniques like connecting to the breath, creative tools or mindfulness to manage stress.

8. Create routines

• Predictable routines provide structure and security for children.
• Consistent bedtime and meal routines promote healthy habits.

9. Encourage curiosity and creativity

• Support their interests, no matter how small, to foster creativity and a love for learning.
• Provide a stimulating environment with books, puzzles and hands-on activities.

10. Teach gratitude and empathy

• Model gratitude by thanking others and discussing what you’re grateful for.
• Encourage acts of kindness and talk about how their actions affect others.

11. Adapt your approach as they grow

• Stay flexible, as what works for a toddler may not work for a teenager.
• Stay informed about child development milestones to set realistic expectations.

The goal of parenting is not to be perfect but to be present, responsive and willing to learn and grow alongside your TCK child – so that you can both flourish. Above all, take care of yourself. Practise self-care, manage stress and seek support from friends, family or parenting groups, if needed. Your wellbeing is important too!

PHOTO: COTTONBRO STUDIO/PEXELS

Is there anything you’d add to this list? Which pointers have you found helpful and which do you prioritise? We’d love to hear from you!