With Valentine’s Day just around the corner, this is a great time to think about our relationships – and by that we don’t mean which singing card to buy! Here’s a chance, before the hype of Valentine’s Day, to reflect on what “relationship” means to you, as well how you (and your partner) perceive and experience commitment. If you are single, this is an opportunity to enjoy creating your vision of a future partner. Most of all, today’s article is about inspiring and celebrating love and joy for all of us…
Below you will find an exercise that guides you to answering questions like:
- What are the qualities I look for in a partner?
- Is this person right for me?
- How much do our childhood experiences of love and commitment differ?
- Do we share similar values and ideas around commitment?
- Do we share a common vision for the relationship?
Exercise: Insight into your relationship
Complete the questions that follow. If you are in a relationship, you and your partner may enjoy doing the exercise together – or even separately and then comparing notes (this can be fascinating!). Again, if you are single, the exercise is a wonderful way to reflect on what kind of partner you are looking for.
- How would you define commitment?
- How would you define love?
- How were you raised at home to regard love? Think of some of your examples of intimacy, tenderness and communication.
- How would you like your relationship to be similar to your parents’ relationship? How would you like it to be different?
- As you look towards a committed relationship with your partner, what fears and concerns do you have?
- What are your main reasons for being in your relationship? Why are you committed to this person in particular? (Feel free to list several reasons.)
- What about your relationship with your partner indicates that this relationship is right for the two of you?
- What is it about your relationship that you want to be known for or to achieve together?
- What other areas would you like to discuss with your partner?
Remember, there is no manual for Mr or Mrs Right. Relationships, rather, are all about feeling valued, loved, respected and worthy.
I would love to hear from you! Did you find this exercise valuable? Did you learn something new about yourself or your partner?
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